I'd Like My 200 Apple Pies Instead Please

That was how CNN chose to try to explain how much money $700 billion is--it's 200 McDonald's apple pies for every single American. Okay, NOW I get it.

Before I get to my main point, I have to share the latest song to get stuck in my head. It's "You Don't Know Me" by Ben Folds, who's something of a hero for nerds like me, with Regina Spektor singing backup. Catchy as all hell.



I'm starting to smell a conspiracy. I don't usually go in for the more wacko theories about how the government took down the WTC or stuff like that, but I'm starting to feel like this whole Wall Street meltdown and bailout was planned from the start. I read an excellent article on the Daily Kos explaining how we got into this mess. If you're at all interested in understanding it, give it a shot--it's long and a bit confusing in parts, but if you stick with it, it actually starts to make sense. It just seems like it couldn't possibly have been just blind greed and optimism--they must have known it would blow up at some point, and I'm starting to think they had some backdoor deal with the administration that when that time came, the government would foot the bill. And the nerve of those CEOs who are saying they won't go along with the bailout plan if it means giving up their millions of dollars in golden parachute bonuses! I bet they get away with it.

I mean, this administration spends money like a drunken sailor. A trillion dollars for a pointless war? Sure! Another trillion dollars to bail out greedy investment banks preying on poor people trying to own a home? Why not!

I want my fucking money back. These idiots are less qualified than even I am to do the right thing with it. I'm going to go invest in apple pies. Mmmm pie.